The Job Interview

A necessary evil. Applicants hate it because they only have limited time to sell themselves. Employers hate it because it is artificial and often the best interviewee isn’t often the best person for the job. The interview is a dreadful way to select an employee because either they have to face the unexpected or the person excels at a standard interview. Different interview formats and interviews conducted in open areas with distractions heighten the madness.

One on One

The typical cookie cutter interview is the format with the least amount of surprises. Very little is to fear in this interview. The interview consists of mostly standard questions.

Why do want this job?
What are your weaknesses?
When stranded on a alien planet which unconventional weapon would you prefer to use against space mutants?

This interview is more like a regular conversation and sometimes if the applicant is relaxed they may release information that will eliminate them from the competition. Often there are a few difficult questions but nothing severe compared to the other formats.

Two on One

Two interviewers and one applicant adds to the stress. Not only there are two people too impress, but one person is overtly friendly and the other is overtly aggressive. Regardless of how the interview is planned out, one person is the good cop and other is the bad cop. The bad cop is the aggressive interviewer who will highlight your flaws. The good cop is the one to actually fear. That interviewer will comfort you and exploit your weaknesses.

Three on One

The 3-interviewer format is eerily similar to the 2 on 1 interview; except there is a silent 3rd person in the room. The good cop and bad cop are asking the questions and the silent person (person who is actually making the hiring decision) is just sitting there. Automatically a difficult situation is created when you are forced to answer questions from subordinates while the person in charges just watches. When answering questions you also have to divide your face time with the questioners and glance every so often at the silent person who actually has the power. Why aren’t they asking any questions? Why is that person just sitting there, watching me? Under this format the applicant has no choice but to answer the questions from two people and at the same time stay cool while someone just watches with a dead expression on their face.

Panel Interview

If a company needs more than three people to interview you- it proves the company is in a mess. If three or less people are not capable of interviewing one person the company’s job roles are cluttered and if you get the job you won’t even know which one is actually your boss. When the interview room is that crowded it proves to the applicant that management is insecure and wastes several people’s to make a hiring decision. The best solution for the application if faced with this interview is to run away.

Related Rants:

Nut Free Nation

Michael Moore

Jerry Seinfeld

Updated: September 6, 2010
Created: April 10, 2007
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